For some reason the toilet seat in the men's bathroom has a tendency to fall down after you lift it up. It used to happen all the time but it hasn't really been an issue lately... Today however, it was.
Usually it falls right after you lift it up. With that in mind as I whipped out my manhood, I paused a good 2-3 seconds. When the seat didn't fall back down I started doing my business.
I was about halfway through my deed when I saw the seat starting to tip forward... Instinctively I reached my hand out to try and stop the seat before it fell into "the line of fire" but that only made things worse.
I ended up not only peeing on the wall, but I got a little on my hand as well... not a lot, but enough.
I washed pretty thoroughly in the sink, and then back at my desk I broke out some disinfectant soap gel stuff... this was followed up by lemon scented hand moisturizer but still, piss is piss.
So if you happen to see me today on the subway or walking the streets of Capitol Hill, you might not want to shake my hand.
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9 comments:
Always with the stories, you are. I so rarely tell stories on my blog. All I ever do is think. I need to join a writing group.
I hear you brother. There is only one thing worse than getting pee on your hand...
I feel ya. The sit in our house is padded plastic. It would never sit still. It would always fall. It got so bad. I would just sit and pee instead of stand. It was so annoying.
Who stands when they piss, anyway?
One of the few things I remember learning in school - urine is sterile.
I still wouldn't want to shake your hand though :)
pee is full of protein!!! or is that mucus...hehehehe which ever, i agree with Lauren i still wouldn't shake your hand.
regina- isn't that what our little blog community is? like an unofficial, unorganized little writing club
hp- thankfully I managed to get away with just the pee issue
santiago- moe greene is a big proponent of sitting to pee... i tried it for a while and occasionally still use when I'm too drunk to stand and aim or sometimes late at night when I dont feel like turning on the lights... but I feel like such a woman when I do it. moe doesn't have that issue.
moe- (see above)
lauren/sonrisa- you guys can ramble on about the positives of urine all you want but the bottom line is you still that you wouldn't do the handshake, and nobody could blame you.
ha, i knew it sucked to pee standing! ha ha ha! :p
cad- I tried to come up with some kind of way to turn this around and tell you how great the ability to pee standing up really is, but sadly, it really isn't THAT great... if we have to pee outside it's an advantage, and I guess it makes it better to pee in the shower as well, but you're really not missing out on too much.
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