So I've decided what my life is really missing is some kind of journal or notebook that I could carry around with me at all times.
In my mind it would look very distinguished with out being at all pretentious... It should have a well worn brown leather cover with thick pages inside... It would have lots of loose papers hanging out the side and falling out the bottom... To counter this I have some kind of string or ribbon holding the whole book together... maybe gold ribbon?
People would admire it in the way they admire an old truck, or a fat old English bulldog... "it's a little rough around the edges but it's got lots of character," they would think to themselves.
I'll take it on the subway with me to jot down lots of really insightful and clever comments about the people around me.
I'll take it to my secret park where I'll make lots of really great sketches of mothers pushing their kids on the swing sets, or college girls with moist luscious lips sipping a frappuccino from a straw.
I'll take the journal to big fancy libraries with endless shelves of books and marble floors. I'll bury my face in really important books on philosophy and write introspective notes with deep personal meaning. When I read it back months later it will give me wisdom.
People will see me and say, "oh that's the guy who's always carrying around that journal."
They'll ponder it's contents but they won't dare look inside. Some might have the courage to ask me... Maybe one day it will be a sexy Russian girl with a cute accent and dark wavy hair. She'll be wearing low cut jeans with holes in the knees and a tight black V-neck sweater. She'll have on really sensual perfume and I won't be able to resist her dangerous inquiry. I'll read her some of the wisdom I've jotted down over the years and she'll of course fall hopelessly in love with me.
She'll want me to write about her in the journal. And of course... I will.
Does anyone know where I could find such a journal?
Like I said, I'm looking for distinguished but not pretentious... I think I want it to be brown leather, but probably not black.
It needs to have really cool looking paper. Thick paper... but I would also prefer it to be loose paper so I don't have to tear any out where I practiced my signature over and over, or drew a really obscene cartoon, or wrote down the Russian girl's phone number.
And oh yeah, I'm working on a limited budget too. I don't want to pay more than $40 for the whole package... Any suggestions?
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Farting in the Shower is a ramblingand ecclectic mix of short stories, embarrasing confessions, pictures, and fast food reviews.
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4 comments:
The obvious choices would be Barnes and Noble or Borders. Maybe try some hole-in-the-wall place in DC where all the too-good-for-Borders people go?
actually, I think I may have found one... there was one I liked on amazon that borders also sells:
What I looked at
but it was borderline pretentious plus it was like $60 so I ruled it out.
then I stumbled onto this one:
What I bought
it's not what I imagined, but it's apparently highly reccomended and I liked it enough to buy it... although im still on the look out for my dream journal
Man, you have the biggest imagination of any blogger I know.
On a somewhat related note...here is something semi private about me - I have a horrible memory!
Seriously. I don't remember whole chunks of my life. And its something that has bothered me more and more over the years. Its the main reason I dont drink diet soda - the trade off seems to be weight gain (Original soda) vs. memory loss (from the sweetners they put in the diet). I figure with my limited memory Id rather gain the weight.
So one of my solutions has been to use Quicken (yes, the financial software tool) as my own personal journal. I started using it for financial reasons somewhere around 2000...but it has quickly evolved to a journal. Its gotten so bad that I literally input every DOLLAR I spend in that thing. If I go to the vending machine to buy a pop tart...it goes in there. When I go somewhere and don't spend any money, it goes in there too. Though I assign some < $1.00 value to the event else quicken wont store it in order. That detailed. Its been that way for a few years now.
Its my own weird way to remember what I was doing over the years (in addition to what I wasted money on). Now I can look back and see what I did on X date a few years ago.
Weird, I know. But its my own little journal and my way to combat this scary memory loss.
Btw, I have no idea where you can find that journal of yours. :-)
wow, that is so anal and repeatative that I can totally see myself doing it... I'm a statistics kind of guy. and the results would probably shame me to stop wasting so much money. I may have to give that a try.
I read somewhere about a guy who always kept travel diaries but had to stop b/c all he could ever remember was what he wrote down. seems to have the oposite effect for you.
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