The Godfather meets the Washington Nationals

Gustavo, Moe Green, and Cindy, the dozen or so people who read my blog aren't big baseball people... So I came up with an idea (translation: stole idea from favorite sports writer) to hopefully keep everyone interested. I'm going to hand out post season awards based on quotes and characters from "The Godfather" (It's not only one of my Top 5 Favorite movies, it's something most people have seen and love).

Before we get onto the awards let me just say that I see the season as a great success. Even though the team finished 81-81 (a mediocre record on the surface) they managed to win the City over and stay in the Wild Card Race up until the last week of the season... Which is pretty special when you consider that they were picked to be one of the leagues worst teams.

But enough of that, it's time to hand out Joel's First Annual Godfather Awards!

Quotes first:

"I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse"- Perhaps the most famous quote of the movie goes to Frank Robinson, the Nats manager... Midway through the season star pitcher Livan Hernandez was unhappy after a loss and said he wanted to have season ending knee surgery. Frank took him into his office the next day for a private "talk"... When they came out of the office Livan's knee had magically healed and he finished out the year.

"It's a Sicilian message. It means Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes"- This award goes to none other than Nats Second Baseman Jose Vidro. Before the season started there was talk of him maybe returning to his former All-Star status but he was hurt and ineffective all year long, and clearly done.

"Oh, Paulie? Won't see him no more"- This is my favorite quote of the movie and it goes to diva pitcher Zach Day... He couldn't find the strike zone all year and then made the mistake of turning his back on Frank Robinson when he came out to the mound to talk to him... You don't do that to Frank and everyone knew he was a goner at that point. "Oh, Zach? Won't see him no more." He was sent down to the minors and then traded a month later.

"Leave the gun. Take the cannoli."- This goes to Shortstop Christian Guzman who forgot to bring his bat this year but clearly ate his share of cannoli. He didn't get into playing shape until mid-season, when it was already too late for him to salvage his year.

"I've frisked a thousand young punks"- This is what the Irish Police Captain McClusky says to Sollozzo as Michael heads to the bathroom. He was clearly underestimating young Michael Corleone, and we know what happened when Mike came out of the bathroom. The award goes to John Patterson/The Arizona Diamondbacks. The D-Backs let Patterson go last year and now he's living up to his potential with the Nats. Peter Gammons (baseball Nostradamus) says Patterson will be an All-Star in the next two years.

"Hey, whataya gonna do, nice college boy, eh? Didn't want to get mixed up in the Family business, huh? Now you wanna gun down a police captain, why, because he slapped ya in the face a little bit? Hah? What do you think this is the Army, where you shoot'em a mile away? You've gotta get up close like this and bada-Bing! You blow their brains all over your nice Ivy League suit"- This goes to Ryan Zimmerman who came straight from college to the Majors in 2 months. He then proceeded to hit .397 in 20 games with the big club and become every experts pick for next great Third Baseman.

"Tattaglia's a pimp, he never could've out fought Santino. But I didn't know until this very day, that it was Barzini all along"- To me this is the last time you see The Godfather at anywhere close to full strength. He figures it all out and helps Michael through the end before having his garden death scene. The award goes to Vinny Castilla who used every last bit of strength to get to the end of the season. Nice career Vinny, now it's time to play tag with your grandson in the garden.

"If I had a wartime consiglieri- a Sicilian -I wouldn't be in this shape!"- This goes to Major League Baseball who wouldn't allow the appointed GM to resign Vladamir Gurrero a few years back. He would have been the difference between us being a good team and a great team.

"Do you know who I am? I'm Moe Greene! I made my bones when you were going out with cheerleaders!"- This is a great line which was made better by the fact that the next time we saw Moe, he took a bullet in the eye. The award goes to Tomo Ohka who also failed to show Frank Robinson respect and was then sent to Milwaukee... If that's not a bullet in the eye, I don't know what is... Have fun being a Brewer Tomo!

"It's not personal, Sonny. It's strictly business."- This has to go to Preston Wilson who came in at the trade deadline and played very well for us... BUT, he won't be resigned. He's too old, too injury prone and too expensive. But it's just bushiness.

The Cast Awards:

Vito Award (For having the Most Respect)- Frank Robinson, for obvious reasons.

Michael Award (Showing the most Potential)- Ryan Zimmerman, he is the future of the franchise.

Sonny Award (Most likely to go Crazy)- Jose Guillen, who flies off the handle and scares everyone sometimes, but he means well. I'll never forget the first game of the year when he hit a HR and then wrapped his arm around Carlos Baerga in the dugout... Carlos was terrified that Jose was trying to choke him, but then realized Jose just wanted a hug. It was a priceless moment.

Fredo Award (Biggest disappointment)- Brad Wilkerson. He was billed as the team star before the season but spent the year looking like... Well, looking like Fredo when the assassins came for his dad.

Tom Hagen Award (Quietly getting the Job Done)- The most underrated character of the movie goes to the most underrated player on the team, Esteban Loaiza, who quietly had an excellent year and kept us going with his reliable starts.

Kay Award (Most Feminine)- Everybody hates Kay, everybody hates John Halama. Kay is a girl, John throws like a girl... Which is a bad thing when you're a pitcher! (No offense to Cindy who I'm sure has some zip on her fastball)

Clemenza Award (Most lovable chubby guy)- Carlos Baerga, he's fat, he's old, he's wise.

Tessio Award (Least trustworthy)- He tried to sell out the family so they killed him. Reads a lot like the Zach Day biography.

Luca Brasi Award (Most Loyal)- Big and reliable, the enemy knew they had to kill Luca to stop him... And you'd have to kill Livan Hernandez to get him to come out of the game early.

Carlo Award (Most Hated)- Just a despicable character who beat his pregnant wife and conspired to have his brother in law (Sonny) killed... Christian Guzman was a god awful hitter and then had the nerve to be inconsistent in the field. He got his big payday and quit working out. Had he showed up in shape when he could have really been the difference this year. His strong finish over the last month and a half was too little too late.

And finally, the award for my favorite character in the movie goes to the Team MVP (as far as I'm concerned):

Appolonia Award (Makes my heart skip a beat)- I fell for Appolonia the first time I saw her, and I fell for Chad "The Cheif" Cordero the first time I saw him waddle out from the bullpen, his head down and his hat tilted slightly to the side.