My New Job

So, about 3 months ago I started my new job... I don't really want to get too specific so lets just say I do customer service along with some selling... I'm not a salesman in the sleazy sense of the word that conjures up images of short sleeve dress shirts with a ties and suspenders... It's not that kind of job. I don't have to bother anyone or make calls or anything like that... okay fine, twist my arm, I work at an insurance agency (which shall remain anonymous).
My friend Duck Fook hooked me up with this job because he knew I was moving back to Frederick and wasn't thrilled with a potential daily commute to DC... So here I am. My job is basically to help out with the growing Spanish speaking client base.
I spent the first month or so studying up on my licensing exam and playing translator, which brings me to my story:
It's my first day and I'm understandably nervous, but not for the typical "I want to make a good impression", "I hope I like the job" reasons... No, I'm nervous about my Spanish holding up.
If you need me to talk to some cute girl you like who doesn't speak English, If my brother-in-law needs me to read a letter he got from his bank, if I have to call in an order of papusas de ribuelta, I'm your guy... Talking to my wife or her family, I'm pretty damn money... but translating insurance policies?!?! who knows?
But the bottom line is, it's show time... I need to be able to get the job done or Duck Fook and I will find ourselves down at the unemployment office.
Nobody wants to hear me bitch about how I have trouble understanding the Puerto Rican accent because I'm used to only talking to people form Central America... My boss has trouble getting the concept that not everybody who speaks Spanish is a Mexican... seriously I've told him my wife is from El Salvador like 8 times and I'm almost positive that he thinks El Salvador is a city near Cancun... Do you think THAT guy will understand if I struggle to understand the accent of a peasant farmer from Argentina?
So you can imagine how petrified I was the first time I was called over to translate... It was 2 guys, one of whom was acting as pseudo translator for his uncle who spoke little English. They were very surprised when the Gabacho Gordo walked across the office and begin speaking Spanish to them... So surprised in fact that they began speaking to each other very excitedly in a hushed tone. As I attempted to join there conversation it became very apparent to me that I had no idea what the f-ck they were saying! Their words were quick and high pitched...
For a moment I was panicked. "Oh my god I can't do this job, it's too hard." I wanted to hide under my desk... Then the pseudo translator turned to me and explained, in broken Spanish, that they were "indios", or Indians [his choice of words not mine]... Spanish wasn't there first language either, in fact the uncle didn't speak Spanish at all! Eventually we were able to get through the experience using a mix of Spanish and English that was, I'm sure, unimpressive to everybody nearby listening to hear how I did.
When the men finally left I explained the situation to everyone, but I'm not sure they believed me... They probably thought I was making up an excuse for why things got so complicated. I have since shown that I can hold my own, but at the time I could see the panic hidden behind their "Oh I understand" eyes.
Alas I learned two valuable lessons in this situation [1] Latin America is very diverse, way beyond the common perception of most Gabachos, and [2]I have terrible first day luck.